If there is anything in this world I hate, it’s a bandwagon sports fan. I feel physically ill when I hear the word fan associated with someone who has pulled for multiple teams in the same sport through the years. Granted we have to have a caveat for fantasy footballers to root for players on their fantasy squad, but even that has two hard fast rules in my book. Rule one is you never pull against your favorite team under any circumstances. Rule two is after the fantasy season is over, those players you’ve been rooting for all season are immediately return to the pool of low-down dirty scurvy that make up your favorite team’s bitter enemies. I have had undying loyalty to my favorite team, the Dallas Cowboys, since the 1978 Super Bowl, which at the age of 7 is my earliest clear memory of professional football. Never wanting to be one of those scumbag bandwagon people who call themselves fans, The Cowboys will be my team until death does us part. So why then am I giddy about the current prospects of pulling for a new NFL team? Let me explain…
The affair undermining my marriage with America’s Team began way back in 1998. You see, there is one football team that has my loyalty above the Cowboys, the University of Tennessee. The Vols once had a pretty good quarterback by the name of Peyton Manning. Now I know in my heart of hearts that pulling for anyone but the Cowboys is cheating, but I’d like to take this opportunity to point a finger at others and blame them for my indiscretions. When Peyton was selected by the Indianapolis Colts with the first pick of the 1998 NFL draft, Colts merchandise flooded the sports apparel market in the state of Tennessee. Peer pressure enticed me to support our beloved hero and become a Colts fan.
Since I’m baring my soul here, I’ll go ahead and be honest. Peer pressure had nothing to do with my choice to engage in this affair with the Colts. For four years in his college career, I watched young Peyton Manning walk on water (in this case the Tennessee River which hosts the Vol Navy on fall Saturdays in Knoxville). He sent me an autographed photo to Kunsan Air Base, Korea where I was stationed that read “Thanks for all you do. Keep up the good work. God Bless. Peyton Manning.” He had provided me with my most treasured football memory to that point, an emotional victory in Tuscaloosa that broke an excruciatingly long painful losing streak to Alabama. He led the Big Orange to victory in the first bowl game I ever saw in person. He played in the same backfield with my all-time favorite athlete, James “Little Man” Stewart, once the All-Time leading rusher in Tennessee history and once scored 5 rushing Touchdowns in a game for the Jacksonville Jaguars, who was a childhood teammate of mine in several sports. He postponed becoming the best quarterback ever by returning for his senior season at Tennessee, earning the eternal devotion of Vol Nation. I saw Peyton’s last game in Neyland Stadium, where he beat Vanderbilt before ascending a ladder to lead the Pride of the Southland in a famous rendition of Rocky Top. I, as a grown man of 26 years, bawled the night they gave Peyton’s Heisman Trophy to Charles Woodson in the single biggest rip-off in the history of American sports. (Note- That night I vowed to never again watch the Heisman presentation, and I haven’t) So I can’t sincerely blame the masses for my decision to become a Colts fan, but I can assure you that I’m only one of a huge number of Tennessee fans that did. In my defense, I never pulled for the Colts when they played the Cowboys. Hey, I may be a Bill Clinton, but I’m not a Judas!
So Colts, here we are, 14 years, 60,000 yards, 428 touchdowns, 4 MVP awards, 2 Super Bowls and a world championship later. You have been my second team and provided me with more treasured memories than the Cowboys over that period of time. I will even admit in private that I enjoyed the victory over Tom Brady and the Patriots in the 2006 AFC Championship game more than the 3 Cowboys’ Super Bowl victories in the early ‘90s. Indy has been a great bedfellow, but I’m afraid you’ve lost your charm. I’ve got to be honest with you and let you know I never loved you for your great blue color, or your cool logo, or your Midwestern charm, or even your Lucas Oil money. I only loved you for your quarterback, and as hard as this is for me to say…we’re through, over, done, splitsville baby! Thanks for the memories, but like the man said “Nothing lasts forever”. Well maybe that’s not exactly true, my loyalty to Peyton will last forever.
So, Peyton… where are “we” going? Will it be sunny South Beach? You know Reggie is a Miami guy! Arrowhead Stadium? They have the best fans in the NFL. J-E-T-S, Jets, Jets, Jets? Roll into the Big Apple and show little Bro who the real Quarterback is? I’m kind of liking the desert myself. Can you imagine Larry Fitzgerald on the other end of a Manning missile? Oh yeah P, I’m okay with this move and all, but there is one thing I ask. Please, Please, Please not the Redskins. We don’t want to put that whole “loyal forever” thing I said to the test!